Just Keep Dreaming
For the past several weeks I have sat by my husbands bedside. A man who has never been sick a day in his life. He went through Stage 4 B-cell Lymphoma, chemo, and stem cell replacement. Came through all that, but developed a virus called CMV. Common in stem cell patients. It was difficult to detect it because it was hiding in his bone marrow. Instead of showing up on other parts of his body, it attacked his bowels and ulcerated them. It was so bad at one time they called us to come. I was just finishing my radiation for Brest cancer so I had not been able to come with him when he went through all of the stem cell therapy. I came over a month ago to say our good byes. My oldest son, our Kelsey and myself. My youngest son had to stay with our dogs. He recovered and has been fighting ever since. So when I am with him I think of positive things. Positive light. Healing light. As I draw I am not afraid. I am relaxed and I am open to all things good and healing. We have made so many many friends here. I have faith he will survive. It will be a battle when I get him home. There will be many months of recovery. But we will see it through. In the mean while I will draw and doodle and you dear faithful followers can see the fruits of those dreams. Hopefully the energy that fills my mind will also fill you, where ever you are in life.
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Putting on a good face
Putting on a good face can be the most important thing I start my day off with. If it is a cleaning ritual or the practice of make-up, it can help in setting the day, especially if I battling illness or depression or emotional illness. Just that small investment in myself can make all the difference. It could be a special bath soap or skin lotion, just the act of application and self love. The ritual of self care. Some days it can be all that I have the energy to do. But during the day, I am reminded by a glance in the mirror or by the smell of my skin that there will be a better day.
Living in the moment, not in the future
Living in the moment gives me the freedom of having a good moment, of just making it through that moment. When putting a whole future on my shoulders, it can get overwhelming and, sometimes, too much to bear. I take just that moment to indulge myself. I use oils and sents that help me remember my goals and objectives. The Good.
Keeping a record
Journaling , art journaling, keeping a physical record, something to reflect on makes a world of difference. Some of my writings and drawings, when I reflect on them, give me what I can only describe as relief and encouragement. Some I can’t believe that they came from me. They improve my image of self.
Touching that positive
For the day, and each and every day, I touch the positive. I touch the talisman that relates the purest positive image to me. What I have intended for that day.
Some of my positive thoughts
Compassion for others and for myself